the sleepy bear murders.

THE VICTIMS
In the following order.

Pablo Bear, 19. The son. LaVeyan Satanist, often saw the door opening in his room. At second glance, no one had entered, illusion of door opening was false. Would paint scenes on the barn doors from the sleepy turtle murders which coincidently occurred two years earlier mark the day of his own murder. The cracks in his door would reveal a red glow at night when closed. Was often vulgar towards his grandparents (maternal), who held a sour attitude about Pablo's peers' parental skills. Was found with his wrists slashed in the bathroom.

Pierre Bear, 17. The son. Chose the optional non-religious zealot on the religion brochure in the poll at school. Held the best record in the 5 mile run. Told his parents shortly before his murder that the bad jackals burst through his window and wrote pop lyrics on his walls, then they flew out the window. Also said while getting a cup of water at night two of the bad jackals were lining the butcher knives his mother used in order from largest to smallest. Didn't like tomatoes, lemonade and hot days. Was found in the forest behind his house sprawled on the forest floor wrapped in two layers of plastic bags underneath a UCLA sweatshirt; is believed to have died of extreme dehydration. Possibly from running in amounts his body couldn't handle without the proper resources required to keep him comfortable (water).

Bessy Bear, 11. The daughter. Liked drawing charcoal portraits of Xerxes and putting them on the refrigerator. Told people in her class that she liked listening to The Agro Bears, a band formed 30 years before her time. Most of her classmates believed her to be weird after her musical confession even though she made a friend from the confession, Beryl Pear. Miss Pear (of Toucan descent) also enjoyed The Agro Bears greatly. Confessed to Miss Pear that she believed the bad jackals and the bad foxes were following her home from school. Was found in the bathtub, electrical surges pumping through the water from the several hairdryers in the water plugged in the outlet strip.

Beta Bear, 15. The daughter. Had Winston Churchill as her screensaver. Wished she were alive in Britain during World War II because hiding in the Anderson shelter during the blitz would have been a genuine thrill. Gave a valentine in the shape of a square to her lover, Greta Gumball (of Pharoah Hound descent). Aspired to star in the soap opera "The Young and the Defenseless." Told her school psychologist that the bad jackals dragged her up a tree and taught her acupuncture. Even went so far as admitting the bad jackals showed her future major world events on the metal surface of a toaster. Was found in the closet with lumps in her throat. Lumps were later confirmed to be a collection of marbles she swallowed, bruises indicated it was by force.

Peter Bear, 41. The father. Unimpressed by mechanics, sports and alcohol. Impressed by Beta's obsession with Winston Churchill and Bessy's Xerxes portaits and musical taste. Did not care for Pablo's religious affiliations and Pierre's athleticism. Admitted to his wife that he had dreams of the bad jackals attacking models on the runway at New York City fashion week. Often fantasized about driving the Corvette into the spike strip at his workplace's parking lot. Wondered if numbers had a connection to life, including 37, which he had seen everywhere. Was found slumped in the backseat of the Corvette with a wound to his chest.

Betty Bear, 42. The mother. Always kept up with the grocery list, couldn't wait to read the latest VC Andrews novel when it came out. Regretted marrying her husband because of his favoritism over the children. Once sat in a room with Pierre and Pablo with an ouji board to discover when Peter would die. The date that came up was coming quite soon, Pablo split the board in half and made all promise not to tell a word. Daydreamed she saw an airplane with the bad jackals as the pilots slamming into their house. Was involved in the secretkeeping of the last sleepy turtle, the only survivor of the sleepy turtle murders. Was found with her head in the coffee cake she was baking, she was smothered.

A strenuous investigation of the sleepy bear murders has been launched including exhuming the bodies of all the deceased bad jackal and bad fox family. Information will be posted as it is uncovered.